I like a challenge. 

I often find aka throw myself into situations where my edges and metal will be tested. This is the life of an alchemist. Growth sometimes looks and feels like punishment and the shedding of layers and exposing of new skin is jarring and vulnerable, but what we learn about ourselves and our limits and our faith is well worth the process. I guess this is a most scorpio-like welcome to our season. I am reminded – “As the snake removed the last vestiges of its skin, Spirit asked ‘Are you cooler now, Snake? Are you?'” 

Investing in Us

I recently fully immersed myself back into the world of bodies. It was truly only a matter of time before I found myself resubmerged in gymlife and here it is. In college, it was as an athlete training my body for optimal performance in a team setting – self-improvement for the betterment of the whole. As a coach, it was in analysis and building of younger bodies – based in performance, yes, but not my own. Then, with yoga my body became my personal gym, exercising and acknowledging parts of myself that I had otherwise denied in other gym settings. 

Now, working in an actual gym, I find myself in great observation of bodies. What they do, how they move, how they function, how each individual manifests and displays respect – or lack of – for their own bodies, what sovereignty looks like in others and how it feels IN me. So much emphasis is placed on this vessel – shaping, honing, attempting to come to an understanding of its power and limits. Judging it. Transforming it. And here is a true truth – there are aspects of transformation that no one tells you about that are surprising and fucking haaaaard. Even in my own beautiful, brown, strong, shapely-in-the-right-places 5’8 160lb frame thoughts of inadequacy begin to swim, but… as a result of the work that I have done with Break Method and my own spiritual methodology and connection I am able to quickly stop that shit and remind myself that I am a spiritual creature having a human experience and I have been made new. My thoughts of unworthiness and comparison dissipate with my own sovereign, anchoring truth.

Late October 2020

What many shape and weight loss and body experts and gurus neglect to tell their customers (because often you are just a customer to them) likely because they are either unaware or actually inexperienced is that the body can make the changes and those changes be aesthetically quite beautiful, but if the acknowledgement of the physical changes do not touch or are unaccepted by the mind the transformation is actually painful and short-lived. Feelings of unworthiness and insecurity still flood the neural pathways and there is either an abandonment of the transformation all together or a relentless pursuit of perfection in the physical form only, creating an entire new path of self-sabotage and self-destruction. 

I know the following statement to be the most true – until the inner trauma of the individual is addressed and that individual comes into a place of resolution and healing – a truly sustainable transformation is impossible. 

Late October 2020

If you truly want to change your body – you must change your body, mind, and spirit. Inside Out – simultaneously. Diet and exercise alone will NOT CUT IT.  If these three aspects of the wholeself are not included in the transformational process or program with which you are working it is very likely not going to work or last – it will ultimately be to your detriment. I know this because I have dealt with it myself and observed it in my own clients and students. The ones who are successful and find not only a “better body” but true security and happiness within themselves are the ones who acknowledge their mental, emotional, physical and spiritual needs. Yep, spiritual. Our spiritual nature and need for connection within and without is inescapable and knowledge of this aspect of self is crucial not only in transformation, but in life itself. Trauma has weight and it is aetheric – if you can hack the trauma and release the weight of it the rest will follow. 

Pain v Freedom

I have seen too many people that I love continually run into block after block when attempting to change one or even a few aspects of their lives. Until there is true education in and addressing of the holistic self with care and attention to each aspect of the individual – including the aetheric-self – long-term success, balance and happiness are fleeting and the detrimental cycle continues. 

2016 v 2020

I have grown sick of this seeing cycle play out in people who deserve so much better than what they are being sold. There is a way out of the pain and suffering that we experience on multiple layers and in multiple dimensions and the body is the actual vessel – the truest method of ascension transportation. 

The key is your LGHTBdy. 

Shay Turnbow, my sister in this work, and I are fully invested in showing you how to access, embody and use your LGHTBdy to find real transformation, deep lasting connection and sovereign joy. 

Our first LGHTBdy ascendant transformational group begins January 4th. 

Registration for LGHTBdy will open November 14.


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